Recent Posts
Prayer Support

Did you know we have a prayer team dedicated to praying for our military and their families? You can post a prayer request online, fill out a worship response card during the weekend services or email Deb directly at deb@northcoastchurch.com.

For Marriage

50 Questions to Ask your Spouse on a Date!

ATTENTION READER: This blog post went viral 2 years ago. Since that time it has consistently generated an average of 1,500 hits per day. Obviously, this material is something that people want and need. If you are interested in learning more about our perspective on Marriage and Romance, please check out my book – Intimacy in Marriage. NOW FOR THE ORIGINAL POST: Today at Starbucks I met with a few guys to discuss how what we have been studying on Sunday mornings at Capshaw practically applies to our lives. One of the big things we discovered was the need for very open communication and date nights with our spouses. To help with that I want to share this list of 50 questions that are to be discussed with your spouse while the two of you are alone. Don’t try to tackle too many in one setting. It’s actually best if you just get through a few but really talk in detail. Let me warn you that a couple of the questions are specifically only for married couples. 1. What are your 5 favorite foods, with the most favorite first? 2. What are your 5 favorite kinds of meals, with the most favorite first? 3. What are your 5 favorite desserts, with the most favorite first? 4. What are your 5 favorite restaurants, with the most favorite first? 5. What is your favorite color? 6. What are your 5 favorite hobbies, with the most favorite first? 7. What are your 5 favorite recreations, with the most favorite first? 8. What are your 5 favorite sources of reading, with the most favorite first? 9. What gifts do you like? 10. What is your favorite books(s) of the Bible? Why? 11. What is your favorite verse(s) of the Bible? Why? 12. What is your favorite song? 13. What makes you the most fulfilled or happiest as a...

Read More

10 Misconceptions About Military Families

As the divide between military families and civilians grows, here are some things non-military folks should understand. Reprinted from:  The FEDERALIST,  Author Vanessa Rasarien It’s hard to believe our nation has been at war for over a decade. I was a mere freshman in college when we first headed to Afghanistan, and it certainly doesn’t feel like it’s been that long. As if that doesn’t make me feel old enough, I then realize the youngest among our military ranks were barely in kindergarten at that time. They were the age of my young kids and likely can’t remember a time when our country wasn’t at war…or engaged in “overseas contingency operations.” Whatever you want to call it these days. Yet despite the long years and thousands who have served and sacrificed for our country, the divide between military and civilian remains wide. With veterans now choosing to settle down primarily near military installations, the vast majority of our citizenry will likely experience few connections to someone who has worn a uniform. The only exposure they may have to military life is through the skewed lens of YouTube videos, Pinterest boards, and media reporting. In an effort to correct this, and help us connect, let’s discuss some misconceptions of military families. 1. No One Size Fits All Those in uniform (and their families) are as diverse as the citizenry they’ve sworn to serve. From politics to faith to education, it’s a mixed bag within this tight-knit community. They are conservatives, liberals, moderates, and the politically apathetic. They are married, single, or divorced—with many children or none. They are religious, or not. Their spouses stay home full time, work part time, or have their own careers and professional lives. They sign that dotted line right out of high school, earn bachelor’s degrees, attend trade schools, or hold graduate degrees. Nearly any...

Read More

The 9 Most Overlooked Threats to a Marriage

I feel bad for marital communication, because it gets blamed for everything. For generations, in survey after survey, couples have rated marital communication as the number one problem in marriage. It's not. Marital communication is getting a bad rap. It's like the kid who fights back on the playground. The playground supervisors hear a commotion and turn their heads just in time to see his retaliation. He didn't create the problem; he was reacting to the problem. But he's the one who gets caught, so he's sent off to the principal's office. Or, in the case of marital communication, the therapist's office. I feel bad for marital communication, because everyone gangs up on him, when the truth is, on the playground of marriage, he's just reacting to one of the other troublemakers who started the fight: 1. We marry people because we like who they are. People change. Plan on it. Don't marry someone because of who they are, or who you want them to become.Marry them because of who they are determined to become. And then spend a lifetime joining them in their becoming, as they join you in yours. 2. Marriage doesn't take away our loneliness. To be alive is to be lonely. It's the human condition. Marriage doesn't change the human condition. It can't make us completely unlonely. And when it doesn't, we blame our partner for doing something wrong, or we go searching for companionship elsewhere. Marriage is intended to be a place where two humans share the experience of loneliness and, in the sharing, create moments in which the loneliness dissipates. For a little while. 3. Shame baggage. Yes, we all carry it it. We spend most of our adolescence and early adulthood trying to pretend our shame doesn't exist so, when the person we love triggers it in us, we blame them for creating it. And then we demand they fix it. But the truth is, they didn't create it...

Read More